Today is all about dealing with the place where we spend one-third of our time and what to do when it’s a toxic work environment.  I believe this is important because too many of us dread not only Monday mornings, but Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays.

These days, complaints about toxic workplaces are on the rise. In fact, recent studies highlight the significant issue of toxic work environments, especially among accountants. 

One survey found that one in three employees have left their job due to negative work culture and ineffective management. Additionally, 82% of workers who entered management roles had no formal management training, exacerbating the issue of poor leadership and toxic environments

In the accounting profession specifically, a study revealed that 50% of surveyed accountants reported issues such as poor communication, cliquey colleagues, and bullying as major problems in their workplaces​. Another survey indicated that 22% of employees across various sectors, including accounting, experience harm to their mental health due to workplace toxicity​. 

It’s interesting to note that, fifty years ago, ‘toxic’ often meant actual hazardous chemicals. Now, it covers a spectrum of issues—bad management, office gossip, harassment, and poor work-life balance.

Dealing with toxic work environments isn’t just about making the office a nicer place. It’s about protecting our mental and emotional health. Being stuck in a toxic workplace feels like carrying a heavy burden that drags down both our work and personal lives.

The good news is that as more people are willing to step up and call out unacceptable behavior, many more people and companies are being held accountable and setting an example of what not to do. Where a decade ago everyone tolerated bad bosses and bad work environments, we now need to pay attention when ethical lines are crossed, and speak up, address the issue, or leave if necessary.

But what about the less extreme issues like a demanding boss, office gossip, unmotivated coworkers, or lack of work-life balance? How do you handle these kinds of toxic environments?

In a large company, you might go to HR or consider finding a new job. But what if there’s no HR, or you can’t or don’t want to leave?

If you’ve been in a toxic work environment, you know it creates unrest, constant stress, and low morale. It’s like a fog of frustration, distraction, and overwhelm.

If ignored, these issues seep into your home life, dominate conversations with loved ones, disrupt your sleep, and lead to burnout.

The upside is that even when HR isn’t helpful or quitting isn’t an option, there are ways to manage a toxic work environment. You don’t have to feel hopeless or suffer through the daily grind anymore.

In this episode, we’ll explore why toxic work environments happen, how they affect us, and most importantly, what we can do about them.

Why You Might Be Dreading Your Job

It’s normal for job satisfaction to fluctuate, especially in a demanding field like accounting. Sometimes, you feel proud of your work, and other times, you question your career choices.

This ebb and flow is part of any profession, but accounting can make those lows particularly tough. Just like you, I’ve met very few people who love their job all the time and are okay with every aspect of it.

Here are some common complaints among accountants:

Demanding Deadlines: Constant pressure to meet quarterly reports and tax filing deadlines can be overwhelming.

Work Overload: Handling multiple clients or projects can lead to burnout, especially when work isn’t fairly allocated.

Lack of Recognition: Doing your best without acknowledgment can be disheartening. We don’t need a gold star on everything, but lack of recognition can wear you down.

Office Politics: One of the biggest complaints. Navigating gossip and favoritism can be exhausting.

Poor Management: Ever heard the quote, “People don’t leave jobs; they leave managers”? Dealing with demanding, uncommunicative, or micromanaging bosses can drain your motivation.

Work-Life Imbalance: Long hours and the expectation to be available around the clock can make it hard to maintain a healthy balance.

These issues can crush morale and take a toll on mental health, leading to anxiety, depression, and even physical problems.

But here’s the thing: Often, the reason you dread your job has more to do with your mindset and how you perceive the demands, the people, and the environment than the actual job itself.

This might not sound like good news, but it actually is. Recognizing that you have the power to change your perspective can help reduce anxiety, frustration, and overwhelm.

This doesn’t mean you should tolerate unacceptable behavior or stay in a situation where you feel mistreated. If you feel unsafe or unfairly treated, speak up, set firm boundaries, or consider leaving.

For those dealing with moderate toxicity—like stress, difficult coworkers, or lack of balance—there are ways to improve your situation. If you’re frustrated but not in immediate danger, you can take steps to make your job more manageable.

The hard truth is, it’s not your job’s responsibility to make you happy, nor can your job inherently make you unhappy. It’s your relationship with your job, or the thoughts you have about your job, that creates how you feel about your job.

Understanding and accepting this is crucial because feeling powerless at work can impact your personal and professional life. This sense of powerlessness can become a major distraction, affecting your performance and well-being at home.

And let’s be honest—the added stress can mess with your mood, productivity, and even your sleep.

Thankfully, by shifting your focus from external issues to what you can control—your internal responses—you can take charge of your work experience and improve your overall quality of life.

Understanding Your Relationship with Your Job

Let’s be real—if we all quit our accounting jobs every time work or people got tough, we’d never stick around anywhere for long. We’ve all faced challenging work environments to some extent, some more toxic than others.

The key to dealing with a toxic work environment is understanding your relationship with your job. Just like with people, you have relationships with things like money, time, and yes, your job.

Every relationship is shaped by your thoughts about the person, place, or thing involved. This includes your job.

So, how do you feel when you think about your job? Excited, energized, respected? Or stressed, overwhelmed, and anxious?

Understanding how you currently feel about your job is crucial because changing any relationship starts with knowing where you stand. You need to be clear about your current feelings to move toward where you want to be.

Don’t just assume you hate your job and leave it at that. Take some time to really sit with it and ask yourself what your predominant feeling is toward your job.

Think of it this way: if you had the same relationship with a person, how would you describe your feelings about them? By examining your feelings about your job, you can better understand your relationship with it and take steps to improve it, even in a toxic environment.

Let me share a personal story. A few years ago, I had an incident with my bosses that left me feeling deeply mistrustful of them and my job.

In my personal time, I became certified as a life coach and started coaching clients on moving on after divorce. My bosses found out and brought it up during my annual review, even though it didn’t affect my accounting work at all.

This boundary-crossing made me feel like I was doing something wrong, even though I wasn’t. Up until then, I had enjoyed many aspects of my job, but suddenly, it felt toxic, like I was being watched all the time, even outside of work.

Dealing with the aftermath of that review was tough. I had to decide whether to stay at the firm or leave. There were many good aspects of the job, like flexibility and proximity to home, but my relationship with my job was strained.

Here’s the thing—there are plenty of valid reasons to change jobs or leave entirely, but it’s crucial to do it for the right reasons. If you’re just trying to escape feelings of stress or anxiety, those feelings are likely to follow you to your next job.

Bottom line: It’s important to address the underlying issues rather than just running away from them.

Your Brain’s Role in Dealing with a Toxic Work Environment

Understanding how your brain deals with a toxic work environment is crucial. Our brains are incredibly powerful, shaping our perceptions, reactions, and overall experiences.

From a young age, our brains start forming patterns based on our experiences and the information we receive. These patterns help us navigate life by creating shortcuts for how we think and react.

For example, if you’ve had a demanding boss in the past, your brain might automatically associate certain behaviors or situations with stress and anxiety.

Over time, these patterns get ingrained, influencing how we perceive and respond to various situations. In a toxic work environment, past negative experiences can shape how you view your current job, even if things have changed.

The problem is, when you’re in what you consider a toxic work environment, your brain’s negative patterns can become even more pronounced. These patterns can make it hard to see any positive aspects of your job, leading to a cycle of stress and dissatisfaction. If you’re used to being criticized, you might start expecting criticism even when it’s not there, which ramps up your anxiety and stress.

Negative thought patterns also impact your physical health. Chronic stress from a toxic work environment can lead to headaches, fatigue, and even long-term conditions like heart disease.

Understanding how your brain’s patterns contribute to stress is the first step in breaking the cycle.

Bottom line: Our brains develop patterns of thoughts and beliefs through our personal and work experiences, and these patterns stick with us until we actively change them.

So, what can you do when leaving isn’t an option?  Let me explain.

What to Do When You Work in a Toxic Work Environment

Dealing with a toxic work environment is tough, and the urge to leave can be strong. But before making any big decisions, remember that you have the power to change your relationship with your job.

The good news is our brains can change. This concept, called neuroplasticity, means you can rewire your brain with intentional effort to develop healthier thoughts and reactions.

By changing your perspective, you can improve your experience and possibly transform your work environment.

Here are some practical steps to help you improve your relationship with your job:

Awareness: Start by noticing your thought patterns. How do you react to situations at work? Do you assume the worst? Focus more on negative interactions than positive ones? Recognizing these patterns is the first step to change.

Challenge Negative Thoughts: Once you’re aware of negative thoughts, challenge them. Ask if your thoughts are based on facts or assumptions. If you think, “My boss hates me,” ask if that’s really true. Maybe your boss’s behavior is more about their stress than your performance.

Reframe Your Thoughts: Replace negative thoughts with positive or neutral ones. Instead of “I can’t handle this workload,” try “This workload is challenging, but I have the skills to manage it.” This practice helps shift your brain from negative to balanced thinking.

Seek Positive Experiences: Look for positive experiences at work. Acknowledge a job well done, build supportive relationships with colleagues, or set small, achievable goals. Positive reinforcement helps create healthier neural pathways.

By understanding and changing your thought patterns, you can better manage and improve your experience in a toxic work environment. This not only boosts your professional life but also your overall well-being.

Here are more tips for dealing with a toxic work environment:

Acknowledge Your Feelings: Recognize how you feel about your job. Are you stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed? Understanding your emotions is the first step to addressing them.

Set Boundaries: Define boundaries to protect your well-being. This might mean setting limits on work hours or avoiding office gossip. Boundaries help create a healthier work-life balance and reduce stress.

Focus on What You Can Control: Concentrate on aspects of your job you can control, like your attitude, work ethic, and interactions with colleagues. This makes you feel more empowered and less affected by external circumstances.

Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to seek support from trusted colleagues, mentors, or coaches. Talking about your experiences can provide new insights and help you feel less isolated. If you need to talk to someone outside your organization, that’s what I’m here for.

Take Care of Yourself: Take care of your physical and mental health. Regular exercise, a healthy diet, and adequate sleep can improve your resilience and overall outlook on life and work.

While it may not happen overnight, these steps can help you feel more in control and improve your job satisfaction over time.

But if you need to leave, that’s okay too. Just know you can always improve your current relationship with your job by thinking about the kind of relationship you want to have.

Would you prefer to feel focused, supported, and engaged? That doesn’t depend on anyone or anything changing.

Think about a long-term relationship you’ve had with a partner or a close friend. You’ve probably had disagreements and challenges but worked through them. You chose to improve that relationship, learning and growing along the way.

The same approach applies to your job. By working towards the relationship you want with your job, you can create a deeper, more fulfilling connection, especially during tough times when leaving seems easier than staying and working things out.

The truth is, when you learn to feel how you want to feel, you’ll be amazed at how much better you’ll feel about your job. You’ll take your power back and create the environment that works best for you.

Becoming a Smarter Accountant: How I Dealt With a Toxic Work Environment

After that tough annual review I mentioned, I knew I needed to make a change—not necessarily by leaving my job, but by changing how I thought about it. I realized that if I didn’t address my feelings of mistrust and stress, they’d just follow me to any new job, causing the same issues all over again.

First, I stepped back and thought about my relationship with my job. I admitted to myself that I felt mistrust and saw how it was affecting my daily work life. Instead of viewing my bosses’ actions as personal attacks, I tried to understand their point of view—they were probably worried about my focus and commitment to the firm.

Next, I worked on changing my thoughts. Instead of thinking, “They’re watching my every move,” I started to think, “They want to make sure my work here is my top priority.” This shift helped me feel less like I was under constant surveillance and allowed me to appreciate the positive aspects of my job.

Setting clear boundaries was also important. I openly talked with my bosses about my side business, reassuring them that it didn’t interfere with my responsibilities at the firm. I made sure to keep my coaching activities completely separate from my accounting work, both physically and mentally.

I also sought out positive experiences at work. I built stronger relationships with my colleagues, which helped create a more supportive environment. I began to acknowledge and celebrate my achievements at work, no matter how small, to remind myself of my value and competence.

Over time, I noticed a shift in my relationship with my job. By changing my perspective and dealing with my feelings directly, I began to feel more empowered and less overwhelmed. The work environment, while still challenging at times, felt less toxic because I wasn’t seeing it through a lens of mistrust and stress anymore.

Ultimately, this transformation had a big impact on both my professional and personal life. I became more productive and engaged at work, which improved my overall job satisfaction. At home, I was able to relax and enjoy my time without constantly worrying about work.

What this experience taught me is that while you can’t always change your external circumstances, you can change how you respond to them. By understanding and reshaping my relationship with my job, I was able to create a healthier, more fulfilling work experience.

This empowered approach is something I carry with me, no matter where my career takes me.

Key Takeaway and Action Item

If you’re struggling with a toxic work environment, remember that you have the power to change your experience by shifting your perspective. It’s not just about the external circumstances—it’s about how you respond to them. 

Ask yourself, “What changes in my mindset or approach can I make to improve my experience in my current work environment?”

Start by becoming aware of your thought patterns, challenge negative thoughts, and reframe them into positive or neutral ones. Set clear boundaries, seek support, and focus on what you can control. 

By taking these steps, you can improve your relationship with your job and create a healthier, more fulfilling work environment. Empower yourself to take control, and you’ll see positive changes in both your professional and personal life.

Well, that’s what I have for you.  Thank you for joining me as I discussed how to deal with a toxic work environment.  I hope you’ve gained valuable insights and practical tools.

As I share all the time, you worked hard to become an accountant; it’s time to make it easier to be one.

If you are struggling with any aspect of being an accountant, you can simply go to www.thesmarteraccountant.com/calendar and book a free session with me.

And make sure you check back each week as I help you go from being a stressed accountant to a Smarter Accountant.

Make sure you go to www.thesmarteraccountant.com and take The Smarter Accountant Quiz. You’re going to want to know if you’ve been underutilizing your accountant brain so that you have a starting point for becoming a Smarter Accountant..

Also, I would appreciate it if you could get the word out to other accountants about this podcast.  The more accountants find out about it, the more we can begin to change the narrative in the accounting profession.

The truth is that you’re already smart, but this podcast will show you how to be smarter.