Month: June 2025

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Okay, so let’s start today’s episode with something to consider – saying no is one of the hardest things to do, isn’t it? It feels uncomfortable, maybe even a little selfish.

But the truth is, learning to say no more often might be one of the smartest things you ever do. It can change how you feel about your work, your time, and even your life.

Most accountants I talk to say yes to just about everything. Yes to last-minute client requests, yes to extra work, yes to helping a coworker, yes to family, yes, yes, yes.

And then they wonder why they’re exhausted, overwhelmed, and feeling pulled in a million different directions. It’s not because they don’t work hard enough—it’s because they’re saying yes to too much.

I used to think saying yes meant I was being helpful, responsible, and even a little impressive. But over time, I realized that all those yeses were costing me something.

My time wasn’t really my own. My energy was spread too thin. And I started resenting the very things I had agreed to do.

Have you ever said yes to something and immediately regretted it? Maybe you felt that little pit in your stomach, knowing you just made your life harder.

It’s easy to think that saying yes makes you a team player, a good friend, or a better professional. But what if saying no actually made you smarter about where your time and energy go?

What if saying no didn’t mean missing out but actually meant gaining back control? What if it meant having more space to do what actually matters to you?

I know it’s not easy. The guilt, the worry, the fear of what people will think—it all creeps in.

But what if you could say no in a way that felt good? What would it be like if you could feel more in charge of your time without feeling like you’re letting anyone down?

That’s what we’re going to talk about today. Because the smartest accountants don’t just manage their time—they protect it.

And that starts with learning how to say no.

What Saying No Really Means

Saying no isn’t about being difficult or unhelpful. It’s about being smart with your time, energy, and priorities.

Most accountants don’t struggle with working hard. They struggle with working on the right things because they’re too busy saying yes to everything that comes their way.

Saying no doesn’t mean shutting people out or refusing to help. It means making decisions that support your long-term success instead of reacting to every request that lands on your desk.

Think of it like this—every time you say yes to something, you’re automatically saying no to something else. If you agree to take on a last-minute client request, you might be saying no to finishing your own work on time, getting home for dinner, or even just taking a breath between tasks.

Smarter accountants understand that their time is valuable. They know that every yes should be intentional, not automatic.

One accountant I worked with used to say yes to every single client request, no matter how last-minute or unreasonable. She told herself she was being helpful, but in reality, she was drowning in stress and missing deadlines.

When she finally started saying no—or at least not saying yes right away—something surprising happened. Clients still respected her, her work improved, and she felt less rushed and overwhelmed.

She realized that saying no didn’t hurt her career—it actually made her a better accountant. And it gave her the space to focus on what mattered most.

So now let’s talk about the brain science behind why saying no feels so hard.  

The Brain Science Behind Why Saying No Feels Hard

Saying no seems simple, but your brain often makes it feel impossible. That’s because your brain is wired to seek comfort, avoid conflict, and protect you from perceived risks—even when those risks aren’t real.

One of the biggest reasons saying no feels hard is that the brain craves comfort. Saying yes feels easier in the moment because it avoids the discomfort of setting a boundary or disappointing someone. But what feels good now often leads to stress and overwhelm later.

Then there’s the people-pleasing pattern. When you say yes to someone, your brain gives you a little dopamine hit—the same feel-good chemical that makes eating chocolate or checking social media so satisfying. Your brain likes that quick reward, so it pushes you to keep saying yes, even when you know you shouldn’t.

Another reason your brain resists saying no is something called loss aversion. Your brain naturally fears missing out on opportunities or damaging relationships. It tricks you into thinking that saying no will cause harm, even if saying yes is actually making your life harder.

Part of this struggle comes from the battle between two parts of your brain—the prefrontal cortex and the primitive brain. The prefrontal cortex is the rational part that helps with planning and decision-making. It knows that saying no is important. But the primitive brain is emotional and reactive, and it jumps in with fear, guilt, or worry whenever you try to set a boundary.

So how do you retrain your brain to make saying no easier? It starts with small shifts in thinking. Instead of assuming saying no will cause problems, remind yourself that every no is a yes to something more important. 

Give yourself permission to pause before responding instead of agreeing automatically. And remember that discomfort in the moment is better than stress and regret later.

Once you start rewiring your brain to handle no differently, the next challenge is facing the real-world obstacles that make it even harder. Let’s talk about the biggest struggles accountants have when trying to set boundaries.

Why Accountants Struggle to Say No

Even when you know saying no is the right thing to do, it doesn’t always feel that simple. There are real obstacles that make it hard to set boundaries, especially in a profession where people count on you.

One of the biggest struggles is the fear of disappointing others. Accountants often pride themselves on being reliable, which makes it tough to say no without feeling like they’re letting someone down. But constantly saying yes to avoid upsetting others only leads to frustration and burnout.

Another common fear is worrying about losing clients or opportunities. It seems logical to believe that the more you say yes, the more valuable you become. But in reality, setting boundaries often earns you more respect. Clients and colleagues are more likely to value your time when they see that you do, too.

Then there’s the guilt and internal pressure. Many accountants feel like they should be able to handle everything that comes their way. But instead of asking, “Should I do this?” a better question is, “Is this the best use of my time?” Shifting from guilt to strategy helps make decisions that actually serve you in the long run.

A lack of clear priorities also makes saying no harder. When everything feels important, it’s easy to agree to things out of habit. But when you know what truly matters, it becomes easier to filter out the things that don’t.

I once worked with an accountant who struggled to turn down extra projects, even when she was drowning in work. She felt like saying no would make her seem unhelpful or ungrateful. 

But once she started focusing on the high-impact tasks that actually moved her business forward, she realized something surprising—her work got better, her stress went down, and she had more time for the things that truly mattered.

Overcoming these obstacles isn’t easy, but it’s possible. So let’s dive into why Smarter Accountants choose to say no more often.

Why Smarter Accountants Say No More Often

Time is one thing you can never get back. Once it’s gone, it’s gone, which is why every yes you give automatically means saying no to something else—whether you realize it or not.

Most accountants say yes because they feel like they should. Clients need them, coworkers depend on them, and there’s always more work to be done. But the truth is, saying yes to everything only makes it harder to do anything well.

A big reason for this is something I’ve talked about before on the podcast and it’s called the Mere Urgency Effect. This happens when your brain makes everything feel urgent, even when it’s not. The more you react to every request, the harder it becomes to tell what actually needs your attention.

On top of that, too many decisions wear your brain out. This is called cognitive overload, and it’s why you might feel exhausted at the end of the day even if you didn’t get much done. Every unnecessary yes adds to that mental fatigue.

The more things you take on, the less focus you have. And when your focus is split, the quality of your work suffers. You’re doing more, but you’re not necessarily doing better.

One accountant I worked with used to say yes to everything her clients asked for. She thought it would make them happy, but instead, she felt overwhelmed, rushed, and constantly behind.

Once she started setting boundaries and saying no to things that weren’t truly urgent, her entire work life changed. She had more control over her schedule, got work done more efficiently, and her clients respected her time more than ever.

We’ve covered what’s going on and why we all struggle, now let’s get into how Smarter Accountants are able to say no more often. 

How Smarter Accountants Say No More Often

So how do smarter accountants actually say no more often without feeling terrible about it? They don’t just force themselves to say no—they make it easier by changing how they think about it.

First, smarter accountants give themselves permission to pause. Instead of feeling like they have to answer right away, they build in space by saying things like, “Let me check my schedule and get back to you.”

This short pause gives their brain time to make a thoughtful decision instead of reacting automatically. It helps them shift from people-pleasing to protecting their priorities.

Second, smarter accountants remind themselves that every no is a yes to something else. Saying no isn’t selfish—it’s a smart way to say yes to their own work, health, and well-being.

They keep the bigger picture in mind so that setting boundaries feels good instead of guilt-inducing. They know that every yes needs to be intentional, not automatic.

Third, smarter accountants practice small no’s before tackling bigger ones. They might start by turning down an optional meeting or a task that doesn’t align with their main goals.

Each small no builds their confidence and makes it easier to handle the more difficult situations later. Like anything else, it gets easier with practice.

Finally, smarter accountants use kind but firm language. They’ll say things like, “I’m not able to take that on right now,” or “That doesn’t fit into my schedule this week.”

Being clear and respectful helps set boundaries without sounding defensive or harsh. It also teaches others how to treat their time moving forward.

Over time, each no makes it easier to say the next one. And with every boundary they set, they create more space, more focus, and more control over their time and energy.

Saying no isn’t about shutting people out. It’s about making room for what matters most.

And one of the best ways to do it is by learning from real-life examples of accountants who made this shift. I’ve shared a little bit about some of my clients already, but now I want to look at one powerful transformation.

Becoming a Smarter Accountant: The Most Powerful Transformation I’ve Seen

Of all the accountants I’ve worked with, one transformation stands out the most. This client wasn’t just saying yes too often—she had completely lost control of her time, and she didn’t even realize it.

She was the go-to person for everyone. Clients, colleagues, friends, and even family knew they could rely on her, so they did—constantly. She thought saying yes made her a great accountant, a great coworker, and even a great person. But behind the scenes, she was exhausted, overwhelmed, and running on empty.

She worked late almost every night, yet still felt like she wasn’t doing enough. The stress was affecting her health, her sleep, and her relationships. Worst of all, she started resenting the very people she wanted to help, but she didn’t know how to change.

In our coaching sessions, we focused on one simple but life-changing shift—recognizing the true cost of saying yes. She had never stopped to think about what every yes was taking away from her. When she did, it was eye-opening.

She began practicing a small but powerful habit: pausing before responding. Instead of automatically agreeing to requests, she asked herself, “Is this the best use of my time?” If the answer was no, she gave a short, confident response—without guilt, without over-explaining.

At first, she was terrified of how people would react. Would her clients leave? Would her coworkers think she wasn’t a team player? But something unexpected happened. People respected her boundaries. Some even started mirroring her approach, realizing they, too, had been saying yes too much.

Within weeks, everything changed. She stopped working late every night. Her stress levels dropped. The quality of her work improved because she finally had the time and mental space to focus.

But the most powerful shift happened outside of work. She had more time for her family. She started enjoying her life again. And for the first time in years, she felt in control.

This transformation didn’t happen overnight, but once she saw the results, she never went back to her old ways. Saying no wasn’t about shutting people out—it was about finally putting herself back in the driver’s seat.

And that is the power of learning to say no.

Now that we’ve seen what’s possible, let’s wrap up with the biggest takeaway from today’s episode—and a question for you to think about.

Key Takeaway and Action Item

The smartest accountants aren’t the ones who take on the most work. They’re the ones who know what deserves their time and what doesn’t.

Saying no isn’t about doing less—it’s about doing what matters most. When you stop saying yes out of guilt, fear, or habit, you create space for the work and life you actually want.

You don’t have to change everything overnight. Just start by paying attention to the things you automatically say yes to and ask yourself one simple question.

For this week, ask yourself, ‘What is one thing I’m saying yes to that I know I need to start saying no to?”

Think about that this week. The answer might be exactly what you need to shift how you manage your time, energy, and career.

Pulling Back the Curtain

Pulling back the curtain for a moment…

I used to be the queen of yes. If you needed help? Yes. Last-minute client emergency? Yes. Can I squeeze that in before the weekend? Sure, why not.

I didn’t even realize how automatic it had become. It felt good in the moment—being needed, being helpful. But little by little, the cracks started to show. I was working late every night, feeling completely wiped, and quietly starting to resent the very people I was trying to help.

I remember one Friday night—I had just said yes to reviewing a client’s spreadsheet before Monday. I had already worked a full day, my kids were waiting for dinner, and my husband gave me that look. 

Not judgmental, just… tired. And I realized I hadn’t asked myself the most basic question: Do I actually have the time or energy for this?

That was the night I started rethinking what yes was costing me.

Saying no felt terrible at first. I worried I’d let someone down. That I’d seem selfish or unreliable. But what I didn’t realize is that saying no was actually how I started rebuilding my sanity.

I started small—delaying a response, buying myself some time. “Let me check and get back to you.” It gave me a pause to think, instead of react. And that pause was everything.

It’s funny—once I started saying no, the world didn’t fall apart. People didn’t get mad. Some even respected me more. But the biggest change? I respected myself more. I started trusting myself to know what I could handle—and what I couldn’t.

If this episode hit home for you, I want you to know this: protecting your time is not selfish. It’s strategic. And it’s a big part of what makes an accountant smarter, not just busier.

If you want help figuring out where your time is going and how to reclaim it, take The Smarter Accountant Quiz at www.thesmarteraccountant.com. You’ll see where you might be saying yes out of habit and how to shift that.

And if you’re ready to start saying yes to what matters most—and no to what doesn’t—let’s talk. Schedule your free 30-minute call at www.thesmarteraccountant.com/calendar. I’ll help you get your time, energy, and peace of mind back.

And if this episode gave you something to think about, please share it with another accountant who might need to hear it. Boundaries don’t come naturally in this profession, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get better at them—together.

The truth is, you’re already smart. But this podcast will show you how to be smarter.

Before we get into this week’s episode, I just want to take a moment to welcome any listeners who used to follow me on the CPA MOMS Podcast. After 6 ½ years of hosting that podcast, I was recently let go—which means I now get to focus fully on The Smarter Accountant Podcast. If you’ve been listening to me for a while, I want to reassure you that the same helpful, practical, and honest content you’ve come to expect will absolutely continue here.

And if you’re new to the podcast—welcome! There are over 100 episodes waiting for you, all designed to help you become a smarter, more confident accountant. You can binge, browse, or start wherever you like.

Also, just a quick heads-up: I host a Monthly Group Coaching Program for accountants. We meet on the third Friday of every month at 12 pm EST, and it’s a great space to get support, grow, and connect with others who get what you’re going through. Next month’s topic is Effective Planning, and you’re definitely going to want to check it out.

If you want more details, just email me at dawn@thesmarteraccountant.com. I’d love to have you in the group!

Alright, let’s get into the episode…

Have you ever found yourself feeling uneasy when something good happens? Maybe you nailed a project, got great feedback from a client, or finally took a moment to breathe—and instead of feeling happy, you started worrying about what might go wrong next.

It’s like your brain just can’t let you enjoy the moment. You might not even realize it’s happening because it feels so normal, especially when you’re used to constantly looking for what needs fixing or what’s coming up next. But what if that habit of staying on alert is actually stealing some of your joy?

What if you didn’t have to second-guess your happiness? Imagine celebrating your wins without worrying about what’s coming next.

The truth is, this way of thinking might be doing more harm than you realize. It’s not just about missing out on joy—it could also be adding unnecessary stress to your life and work.

Today I want to talk about a topic that you may have never heard of – foreboding joy – especially as it applies to us as accountants.  

I want to dig into why this happens and how it might be getting in your way. If you’ve ever felt like happiness comes with strings attached, you’re not alone—and we’re going to talk about why it doesn’t have to be that way.

It’s time to give yourself permission to enjoy the good moments—you’ve earned them.

The Concept of “Foreboding Joy”

Have you ever felt really happy about something, only to have this little voice in your head say, “Don’t get too comfortable”? That’s what foreboding joy is—it’s when feeling good makes you nervous, like happiness is a setup for something bad to happen. Instead of enjoying your success, your brain starts playing the ‘what if’ game, stealing the joy from the moment.

This happens a lot to people who are always thinking ahead, like us as accountants. Our job trains us to look for risks, double-check details, and spot mistakes before they cause problems. 

That’s a great skill for work, but it can sneak into other parts of life where it doesn’t really belong. Even when nothing is wrong, your brain might act like there’s trouble just around the corner.

The tricky thing about foreboding joy is how it steals the good moments without you even realizing it. Imagine finishing a big project you worked hard on. Instead of feeling proud or relieved, your brain might say, “What if I missed something?” or “What’s the next problem I need to fix?” That tiny bit of fear can take over, and suddenly, the joy is gone.

Over time, this habit can take a toll. When you’re always bracing for the worst, your stress levels stay high. 

The truth is, it’s exhausting, and it can make everything feel heavier than it needs to be. You might feel like you’re running a never-ending race, constantly pushing forward but never stopping to celebrate the milestones you’ve already hit.

And it doesn’t just affect how you feel about your work. It can creep into your personal life, too. 

Maybe you find it hard to relax, even on vacation, because you’re worried about what’s waiting for you when you get back. Or maybe you shrug off big wins—like landing a new client or getting great feedback—because you’re already thinking about the next challenge.

The problem is, this constant cycle of worry doesn’t actually protect you from anything. All it does is rob you of the chance to enjoy the good stuff you’ve worked so hard for. And when that stress builds up over time, it can lead to burnout, making it even harder to feel good about your work and your life.

But here’s the thing: it doesn’t have to be this way. You don’t have to let fear of what might go wrong take away from what’s going right. Let’s take a closer look at why this happens and what it means for you.

The Brain Science Behind Foreboding Joy

Have you ever wondered why it’s so hard to just enjoy the good moments? It’s not that there’s something wrong with you—it’s just how your brain works. Our brains are wired for survival, not happiness. 

Back when survival meant avoiding wild animals or other dangers, this wiring was super helpful. But now, it can get in the way, especially when you’re trying to feel happy or relaxed.

It’s important to understand that your primitive brain, the part I refer to as the Toddler, is always on the lookout for threats. Think of it as your brain’s alarm system. 

The problem is, it doesn’t always know the difference between a real danger and something harmless, like feeling really happy. Even during joyful moments, your Toddler brain might hit the panic button, making you feel uneasy, like you need to protect yourself.

Here’s where it gets tricky. The brain sometimes connects joy with vulnerability, like letting your guard down might be risky. 

For accountants, this might show up as thoughts like, “If I get too comfortable, I might miss something,” or “What if I make a mistake and everything falls apart?” It’s as if your brain is trying to keep you safe by reminding you not to relax too much.

This is especially true in the accounting world, where so much of our job is about being precise and catching errors. We’re trained to think ahead, double-check everything, and avoid risks at all costs. 

That’s an amazing skill, but it can also make our accountant brain hyper-focused on what might go wrong, even when everything is going right.

Think about how often you scan for problems, even in moments where there aren’t any. It’s like your brain is stuck in work mode, always looking for the next issue to solve. 

This makes it even harder to trust happy moments because your mind is already on high alert, waiting for something to go wrong.

The good news is, this doesn’t mean you’re doomed to feel this way forever. Once you understand how your brain works, you can start to see that those uneasy feelings aren’t warnings—they’re just habits your brain has picked up over time. And like any habit, it’s possible to change it.

Understanding how your brain works is the first step to breaking free from this cycle, but it’s also important to look at how this habit shows up in your day-to-day life. Let’s look at some real-life examples of foreboding joy and how it might be holding you back.

Examples of Foreboding Joy in the Accounting World

Have you ever wrapped up a massive tax return ahead of the deadline, only to feel a wave of worry instead of relief? Maybe your brain starts spinning with thoughts like, “What if I missed a deduction?” or “Did I file the right form?” Instead of celebrating the win, you’re stuck double-guessing your own work.

Or how about when you’re preparing for an important client meeting? You finish all the prep and feel ready, but then the doubts creep in: “What if they ask a question I didn’t think of?” or “What if they aren’t happy with my recommendations?” It’s like your brain won’t let you trust that you’re prepared.

Then there’s the annual review. You get glowing feedback from your boss, and instead of feeling proud, you start thinking, “What if I can’t meet their expectations next year?” It’s like you can’t let yourself enjoy the moment because your brain is already looking for the next challenge—or the next thing to worry about.

Even after delivering spotless financial statements to a client, you might catch yourself holding your breath, wondering, “What if they find something I missed?” You’ve triple-checked everything, but it doesn’t stop that uneasy feeling from creeping in.

These moments happen all the time in a profession where precision and problem-solving are key. But when your brain is constantly focused on what could go wrong, it’s easy to miss out on what’s going right.

I’ve actually spoken to many of my coaching clients about this subject and how foreboding joy shows up in their lives, but now I want to talk about what this pattern might be costing you in the long run.

The Cost of Foreboding Joy

Foreboding joy doesn’t just take the fun out of happy moments—it can sneak into every corner of your life. Have you ever been with your family, but your mind was somewhere else, stuck on work? 

Maybe you’re at your kid’s soccer game or celebrating a birthday, but you can’t fully enjoy it because you’re worrying about deadlines or the emails piling up. It’s like your brain has a hard time letting you enjoy the peace and keeps dragging you back to work worries.

Even when you do take a break, do you ever feel guilty about it? Like you should be doing more, even if you’ve been working nonstop? That constant feeling of “not doing enough” can turn downtime into just another source of stress, instead of the recharge time you really need.

At work, the cost of foreboding joy can add up fast. When you’re always stressed or anxious, it’s harder to stay focused or productive. You might find yourself making small mistakes or feeling drained, no matter how much effort you’re putting in.

It can also affect your relationships with clients and coworkers. Chronic stress has a way of making us less patient, less present, and even less creative. You might miss out on opportunities to grow your career or take on new challenges because you’re stuck in “just keep up” mode.

When foreboding joy becomes the norm, it’s easy to lose sight of why you started this work in the first place. It can leave you feeling disconnected from the things that matter most, both personally and professionally. But here’s the thing: it doesn’t have to stay this way. Let’s explore how you can start shifting this mindset and make room for more joy in your life.

How to Start Shifting This Mindset and Make Room for Joy

The good news is, you can teach your brain a new way to handle joy. It starts with something simple: noticing. 

The next time you feel happy or proud, pause and ask yourself, “What am I thinking right now?” Awareness is the first step to breaking the habit of jumping to worst-case scenarios.

Once you’ve noticed the thought, try gently challenging it. For example, if your brain says, “This won’t last,” you can ask, “What if it does?” Or if you think, “I don’t deserve this,” remind yourself, “I worked hard for this, and I’ve earned it.” 

It’s not about forcing yourself to feel differently—it’s about giving your brain permission to see things in a new way.

Another powerful shift is learning to celebrate the small wins. You don’t have to wait for a huge milestone to feel joy. Finished a tough project? Take five minutes to savor it before jumping to the next task. Landed a new client? Treat yourself to your favorite coffee. 

These little celebrations can help retrain your brain to stay present in the good moments.

It also helps to remind yourself that joy isn’t dangerous. Sometimes, we avoid feeling happy because we think it makes us vulnerable, like we’re letting our guard down. 

But joy isn’t the enemy—it’s what gives you the energy and motivation to keep going. Letting yourself feel good doesn’t mean you’re being careless. It means you’re recharging for what’s ahead.

Finally, practice gratitude. It might sound simple, but taking a moment each day to write down a few things you’re grateful for can change how your brain sees the world. 

Gratitude helps shift your focus from what might go wrong to what’s already going right. Over time, this habit can make joy feel less scary and more natural.

Shifting your mindset isn’t something that happens overnight, and that’s okay. The important thing is to start. By noticing your thoughts and shifting them gently, you can create space for joy without fear tagging along.

Becoming a Smarter Accountant: Learning To Make Room For Joy

As I said before, I’ve spoken to many coaching clients about this topic, so now I want to share about one particular coaching client.

When I started working with her, she looked like she was carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders. She told me how every time she finished a big project, instead of feeling proud or relieved, her mind would go straight to, “What if I missed something?” 

She couldn’t stop replaying her work in her head, searching for mistakes that weren’t there. Even when her boss praised her or a client sent a thank-you email, she couldn’t enjoy it. She was always worrying about the next deadline, the next task, or the next problem waiting to pop up.

And it wasn’t just work. She shared how she’d be sitting at her daughter’s piano recital, trying to stay present, but her mind kept drifting to an unfinished email or a report she needed to double-check. 

She felt so guilty for missing those moments with her family, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t turn her brain off. She said it felt like running on a treadmill that never stopped—no matter how much she did, it was never enough.

As she started The Smarter Accountant Program, she started to notice how much her thoughts were getting in the way. I helped her practice simple things, like pausing when she felt that rush of worry and asking herself, “What if I’ve already done enough?” or “What’s going right in this moment?” 

She told me about a moment that changed everything: she had just signed a huge client she’d been chasing for months. Her first instinct was to worry about whether she’d meet their expectations, but this time, she caught herself. 

Instead of spiraling, she let herself celebrate. She even called her family to share the news—something she said she’d never done before.

In just a short amount of time, I saw her start to shift. She became more aware of those moments when worry wanted to take over, and instead, she learned how to focus on the good things. 

She started celebrating small wins, like wrapping up a report ahead of schedule or even just leaving work on time. She told me she felt lighter and more in control, not just at work but at home, too.

Her story is proof that you don’t have to fix everything overnight. It’s about catching those moments when fear tries to take over and reminding yourself that it’s okay to feel proud, to celebrate, and to let joy in. 

Now I’m going to share the key takeaway from today and an action item for the upcoming week.

Key Takeaway and Action Item

The key takeaway is that joy doesn’t make you vulnerable—your thoughts about it do. Letting yourself enjoy the good moments doesn’t mean you’re letting your guard down; it means you’re giving yourself the energy to take on whatever comes next.

For this week, ask yourself, “What if I let myself enjoy this moment without worrying about what’s next?”

This is a great question because it helps you slow down and stay in the moment. Instead of letting your brain jump to “what if” scenarios, it gently shifts your focus to what’s happening right now. 

By practicing this, you can teach your brain that it’s okay to feel happy—it doesn’t mean you’re ignoring problems, it just means you’re letting yourself feel good when good things happen. Over time, this can make joy feel less scary and more natural.

Pulling Back the Curtain

Pulling back the curtain for a moment…

I remember one tax season where everything was, on paper, going really well. Clients were happy, returns were ahead of schedule, and even my calendar felt manageable for once. But instead of enjoying it, I found myself bracing for something to go wrong.

I’d lie in bed at night going over things I’d already triple-checked. I’d get a kind email from a client and immediately think, “Did I miss something?” It was like I couldn’t fully let myself feel good about anything—I was too busy scanning for the next problem.

That’s foreboding joy.

I didn’t have the name for it at the time, but I lived it. Every win came with a silent warning from my brain: “Don’t relax. Don’t get too happy. You’ll jinx it.”

And I get why. As accountants, we’re trained to anticipate issues. To be thorough. To stay one step ahead. But no one tells us that those same skills can make joy feel like a risk instead of a reward.

What changed things for me was realizing that I didn’t need to earn joy—it was okay to feel it as it was happening. Not later. Not after everything was perfect. Right now.

So if this episode hit home for you, I want you to know this: you’re not weird, broken, or alone. You’re just human. A human with a brain that’s trying to protect you the best way it knows how. But that doesn’t mean you have to listen to every warning it throws at you.

If you want to better understand your accountant brain and how it might be keeping you stuck in fear instead of letting you enjoy the wins, take The Smarter Accountant Quiz at www.thesmarteraccountant.com.

And if you want help untangling some of the patterns you’ve built over time, I’d love to talk. Book a free 30-minute call with me at www.thesmarteraccountant.com/calendar. You don’t have to figure this out alone.

And if this episode felt helpful, please share it with another accountant. There are so many of us walking around waiting for the other shoe to drop—and maybe all it takes is one conversation to let in a little more joy.

The truth is, you’re already smart. But this podcast will show you how to be smarter.

Before we dive in, I wanted to let you know that applications to work with me for July, August, or September are now open!

If you’ve been thinking about getting support—whether it’s with time management, stress, or feeling more in control of your day—this is your chance.

I only take a few accountants each quarter, and if you’re ready to stop spinning your wheels, I’d love to hear from you.  And don’t worry if you have vacation plans; we’ll work around them because I believe that coaching should support your life, not interrupt it.

If you’re interested, just head over to www.thesmarteraccountant.com/application to apply. It’s short, simple, and could be the start of a whole new chapter for you.

Alright, let’s get into the episode…

Okay, let’s talk about time management as accountants because time management is hard enough, but if you’re a perfectionist, it can feel downright impossible. You want everything to be just right, but that takes time—way more time than you actually have.

You check, double-check, and then maybe check one more time, just to be safe. You tweak little details, rewrite emails, and overthink simple decisions. And before you know it, the day is over, and your to-do list is still staring at you.

It’s frustrating, right? You work so hard, but somehow, it still feels like you’re always behind.

Perfectionism makes you believe that if you just try a little harder, everything will turn out exactly the way you want. But the truth is, the harder you try to control everything, the more out of control you actually feel.

For example, have you ever noticed how some people seem to get things done so much faster than you? Meanwhile, you’re stuck, spending way too much time making sure everything is “just right.”

That’s because perfectionism steals your time. It tricks you into thinking that spending extra time on something makes it better when, most of the time, it just keeps you stuck in a loop of never feeling done.

And here’s the thing—it’s not your fault. Your brain is wired to avoid mistakes, so it pushes you to keep fixing, redoing, and making things “perfect.”

But let’s be honest—perfect doesn’t actually exist because it’s subjective. And chasing it just leads to unwanted stress, exhaustion, and feeling like there’s never enough time.

Imagine what it would feel like to finish something without second-guessing yourself. To wrap up your work, close your laptop, and feel done—without overworking yourself or staying late.

That’s not just a nice idea—it’s completely possible. And it doesn’t mean lowering your standards. It just means managing your time in a way that actually works for you, instead of against you.

So how do you stop perfectionism from running the show? And how can you still do great work without wasting hours on tiny details?

That’s exactly what we’re going to talk about today. Let’s get into it.

How Perfectionism Wastes Time

Perfectionism feels like it should help you work better, but in reality, it just slows you down. You spend extra time tweaking things, making sure every little detail is just right—but at some point, all that extra effort stops making a difference.

It’s called diminishing returns—where more time doesn’t actually mean better results. The 80/20 Rule explains this perfectly: 80% of your results come from just 20% of your effort. But perfectionism makes you focus on the other 80%, the tiny details that don’t actually move the needle.

And let’s also talk about mistakes. Perfectionism convinces you that making a mistake is the worst thing that could happen. So instead of finishing a task and moving on, you overthink, double-check, and even redo things that didn’t really need fixing.

There’s actual research on this. A study from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that perfectionists experience much more anxiety and procrastination. Basically, the more pressure you put on yourself to be perfect, the harder it is to get things done.

That’s why perfectionism and procrastination go hand in hand. When you feel like something has to be perfect, it’s easy to put it off until you “have enough time” to do it right. But that time never really comes, does it? Instead, tasks pile up, and stress levels go through the roof.

And that stress is not just annoying—it’s exhausting. The more time you waste perfecting the little things, the less time you have for high-impact work. The important things keep getting pushed to the side while you’re stuck fine-tuning things that don’t really matter.

As we all know as accountants, over time, this leads to burnout. You work longer hours, feel more frustrated, and struggle to find a balance between work and life. And even after all that effort, you still don’t feel like you’ve done enough.

So why does this happen? Why does your brain push you to spend so much time on things that don’t actually help? Let’s take a look at what’s going on next.

The Brain Science Behind Perfectionism and Time Management

If you’ve ever felt like you have to make something perfect, even when you know it’s taking too long, there’s a reason for that. Your brain is actually wired to push you toward perfectionism—even when it’s not helping you.

It all starts with your threat response. The part of your brain that I call the Toddler is designed to keep you safe. But it doesn’t just react to physical danger—it reacts to anything that feels like a threat, including the fear of making a mistake. That’s why perfectionism can feel so intense—it’s not just about doing good work, it’s about avoiding what feels like a failure.

And then there’s dopamine, the feel-good chemical. Every time you fix something, tweak a detail, or make something “better,” your brain gives you a little dopamine hit. 

It feels rewarding in the moment, which makes you want to keep doing it. But that’s how you get stuck in the perfectionist loop—where you keep working on something long past the point where it actually matters.

This also ties into something I’ve discussed on the podcast before called the Mere Urgency Effect. Your brain loves to feel productive, so it pushes you to focus on tasks that seem urgent—even if they’re not important. That’s why you might spend an hour formatting a spreadsheet instead of tackling the high-impact work that actually moves things forward.

And then there’s the Zeigarnik Effect, which makes your brain fixate on unfinished tasks. When something isn’t quite “done,” your brain keeps pulling you back to it, making it hard to move on. This is why perfectionists struggle to let things go—even when they know it’s time to stop.

For example, let’s say you’re writing a client email. You draft it, read it over, and it’s perfectly fine—but instead of hitting send, you reread it again… and again. Maybe you change a word, adjust the tone, reformat a sentence. Even though it was ready 20 minutes ago, your brain won’t let it go because it still feels unfinished. 

That’s the Zeigarnik Effect in action—your brain keeps the task “open” until it’s resolved, and perfectionism makes that resolution nearly impossible to reach. The result is that you stay stuck in the loop, wasting time and mental energy, even when the work is already good enough.

The good news is that just because your brain is wired this way doesn’t mean you have to stay stuck in perfectionism. There’s a smarter way to manage your time without feeling like you’re cutting corners. Let’s talk about what that looks like.

A Smarter Way to Manage Time as a Perfectionist (What You Need to Know)

If you’re a perfectionist, the idea of letting something be just good enough probably makes you a little uncomfortable. But the truth is, perfection isn’t what makes you great at what you do—progress is. The smartest accountants learn to manage their time in a way that works with their brain, not against it.

Here are six smarter shifts that can help:

Shift #1: Adopt the “Done is Better Than Perfect” Mindset

Perfectionists tend to think in extremes—something is either flawless, or it’s a failure. But most things don’t need to be perfect to be effective. Real progress happens when you focus on getting things done instead of getting them perfect.

For example, let’s say you’re preparing slides for a client meeting. You spend an hour tweaking fonts and adjusting spacing, even though the content is already solid. Instead, if you decided early on that your goal was clear communication—not visual perfection—you’d be done in half the time and still make a great impression.

Shift #2: Use the 80% Rule

Before you spend extra time on something, ask yourself, “Is this good enough to be effective?” If the answer is yes, it’s time to move on.

Let me give you my own example. Before writing my book and launching this podcast, I started The CPA MOMS Podcast about 6 years ago. Each week I would do the research, write out the show notes, and hand them to my husband for feedback. I jokingly referred to him as the editor.

I told him, “Just give me a rating on a scale of 1 to 10 and be honest.” The first time he gave me an 8 out of 10, I said, “Great! Nothing more needs to be done.” He was confused—“You don’t want it to be a 10?” I explained that I wanted the podcast to be sustainable, and trying to make every episode a 10 would be a waste of my time and energy.

Now, I use AI tools to analyze the show notes, and as soon as I see an 8 or above, I know it’s time to move on.

Shift #3: Time Block With Constraints

Perfectionism loves open-ended time. But when you set limits upfront, your brain is more likely to stay focused. For example, if you give yourself 30 minutes to review a report, you’ll avoid the rabbit hole of over-fixing details that don’t actually matter.

For example, one of my coaching clients would spend hours preparing month-end financials because she wanted every number perfectly formatted. Once she started blocking 45 minutes for prep, she found she was still delivering excellent reports—but without the mental and emotional drain of trying to make them look “perfect.”

Shift #4: Pre-Decide What’s “Good Enough”

Another powerful technique is deciding what “done” looks like before you even start.

If you’re writing an email, tell yourself: “One draft and a quick read-through, then I hit send.” This simple pre-decision keeps you from falling into the trap of rewriting the same thing five times and still feeling unsure.

For example, imagine you need to respond to a client’s question. Instead of crafting the “perfect” reply and second-guessing every sentence, decide upfront: “Two paragraphs that clearly answer the question, then send.” That decision alone can save you 20–30 minutes and help you feel more confident moving on.

Shift #5: Focus on High-Impact Work

Perfectionists often spend too much time on things that feel urgent but don’t actually move the needle.

That’s where The Decision Matrix comes in. It helps you prioritize based on impact—so your time and energy go toward what matters most, not what’s nagging for your attention. I go deeper into this in The Smarter Accountant Time Management Program, but even a basic shift in focus can make a big difference—especially for perfectionists.

For example, say you’re debating whether to spend another hour proofreading an internal memo or use that hour to prep for a client meeting that could result in new business. Perfectionism might tempt you to polish the memo, but smarter time management will direct you to the task that creates the biggest result.

Shift #6: Reframe Mistakes

The goal isn’t to avoid mistakes—it’s to stop fearing them. Successful people don’t obsess over perfection. They make decisions, take action, and learn along the way.

If you see every mistake as proof you weren’t good enough, you’ll stay stuck. But if you see it as part of the process, you’ll keep growing. Perfectionism might try to protect you from mistakes, but it often just keeps you from moving forward.

For example, one accountant I worked with used to dread sending out draft reports to clients. She didn’t want to be “wrong,” so she’d delay until every possible issue was resolved. Once she began reframing those drafts as a collaboration tool, not a final verdict, she felt less pressure—and clients appreciated the faster turnaround and opportunity to provide feedback.

These shifts make a huge difference, but change doesn’t happen overnight. So what does it actually look like when an accountant moves from perfectionism to a smarter way of working? Let’s take a look at a real-life example.

Becoming a Smarter Accountant: Better Time Management For a Perfectionist

I’ve worked with many coaching clients on better time management for perfectionists, but let me share one story of an accountant who was stuck in the perfectionist trap. Every email, every financial report—triple-checked. Then checked again. 

They stayed late almost every night, trying to make sure everything was flawless, but no matter how much time they put in, it never felt like enough.

They were constantly behind, even though they worked harder than most people around them. There was always one more thing to fix, one more tweak to make. And because of that, their to-do list never seemed to shrink. 

Even when they weren’t at work, they couldn’t shut their brain off. They felt guilty spending time with family because they should be getting more done. But at the same time, they were exhausted from working so much.

During coaching, we focused on small but powerful shifts—applying the 80% Rule, setting time limits, and learning to trust their own judgment. At first, it felt super uncomfortable. They worried that if they didn’t double-check everything, they’d make mistakes or disappoint someone. 

But as they practiced, they started to see that letting things be good enough didn’t mean settling—it meant freeing up their time for the work that actually mattered.

And that’s exactly what happened. Instead of spending hours tweaking reports, they learned to stop when something was effective, not perfect. They started finishing important tasks earlier in the day, instead of scrambling at the last minute because they had wasted time on minor details. 

They stopped rewriting emails five times before sending them. And guess what? Nothing bad happened. The quality of their work didn’t drop. If anything, they were getting better results because they had more time to focus on what actually needed their attention.

But the biggest win was that they got their life back. No more late nights obsessing over tiny details. No more bringing work stress home. 

They actually enjoyed dinner with their family without their mind running through all the things they should be doing. And for the first time in a long time, they felt done at the end of the workday.

This kind of change doesn’t happen overnight, but it is possible. It starts with a simple shift in how you think about time, work, and perfectionism. 

And that brings me to the key takeaway from this episode and one key question I want you to ask yourself.

Key Takeaway and Action Item

The key takeaway from today’s episode is that perfectionism isn’t helping you work better—it’s just stealing your time. The more you try to make everything flawless, the less time you have for the things that actually matter. The smartest accountants don’t waste hours on unnecessary details. They know when to stop, trust their work, and move on.

For this week, ask yourself: “What would happen if I let ‘good enough’ be enough?”

Perfectionism makes you believe that stopping before something is perfect means you’re cutting corners. But what if that wasn’t true? What if you could still produce high-quality work without all the overthinking, redoing, and second-guessing?

And here’s something most perfectionists don’t realize—it’s not just the time you waste while working, it’s the time you waste after working. If you end your day thinking, “I didn’t get enough done,” you’re going to feel frustrated or discouraged. And those emotions won’t fuel the kind of productive, efficient work you need the next day.

This is why I teach my time management coaching clients something called The After Model—because what you think and feel about your work at the end of the day directly impacts how productive you are tomorrow. If you keep telling yourself you should’ve done more, your brain will always believe you’re behind. 

But if instead, you choose a thought like, “I made progress, and I’ll finish this tomorrow,” you’ll feel more focused and in control.

Perfectionists aren’t just hard on themselves while they’re working—they’re hard on themselves after the work is done. But shifting how you think about what did or didn’t get done will make a huge difference in how you show up the next day.

The reality is, most of the extra time you spend fixing things doesn’t change the outcome—it just drains your energy. What if you used that time to tackle more important tasks? Or better yet, what if you used that time to actually enjoy life outside of work?

Perfectionism might feel like it’s helping you do better work, but in reality, it’s just slowing you down. It leads to inefficiency, procrastination, and burnout, making it harder to stay on top of everything. And as we’ve seen, there’s actual brain science behind why it’s so tough to let go of perfectionism and move on.

But here’s the good news—you don’t have to stay stuck in this cycle. Smarter time management isn’t about cutting corners. It’s about knowing when good enough is truly enough and putting your time into the things that actually matter.

At the end of the day, your value as an accountant isn’t in perfect work—it’s in smart, strategic thinking. The more time you waste chasing perfection, the less time you have for high-impact work, for growing your career, and for actually enjoying your life outside of work.

Now, imagine what would happen if you finally gave yourself permission to move on. That’s where real productivity begins.

Pulling Back the Curtain

Pulling back the curtain for a moment…

Perfectionism has been a companion of mine for as long as I can remember. Even early in my career, I wore it like a badge of honor, especially working for the Big 4. I thought it made me better—more responsible, more dependable, more professional.

But over time, it stopped feeling like a strength and started feeling like a trap.

I remember staying late at the office, rereading the same email over and over, rewriting a single paragraph three times, just because it didn’t sound quite right.

And when I’d finally hit send, instead of feeling satisfied, I’d feel tense—like I had missed something, like I should’ve done more. That part was the hardest. Not the doing—it was the never feeling done.

And perfectionism didn’t clock out when I did. I’d come home to my family and my brain would still be spinning. “Should I have added that line to the report? Did I sound too direct in that meeting? Was that spreadsheet formatted exactly right?”

It took me years to realize that perfectionism wasn’t about high standards. It was about fear. Fear of judgment. Fear of being wrong. Fear of not being enough.

And it was stealing my time. Not just during the workday, but in the moments that were supposed to be mine.

That’s when everything started to shift—when I decided that I didn’t need to be perfect to be effective. When I stopped obsessing over the last 10% and started focusing on what actually mattered.

And the interesting thing is that nothing fell apart. I didn’t suddenly become sloppy or careless. If anything, my work got better. It became clearer, more strategic, more sustainable.

If this episode struck a chord and you’ve been thinking, “I need this kind of support,” fill out an application to work with me for July, August, or September are now open.

I work with a small number of accountants each quarter who are ready to stop feeling behind and start working smarter—not harder.

If that sounds like you, head over to www.thesmarteraccountant.com/application and fill out a quick application. We’ll take it from there.

And don’t worry if you’ve got summer plans—we can absolutely work around them.

And if this episode felt helpful, would you do me a favor and share it with another accountant? Perfectionism is everywhere in our profession, but it doesn’t have to be the standard anymore.

The truth is that you’re already smart, but this podcast will show you how to be smarter.

Before I get started I wanted to mention a bonus I created for all the podcast listeners who have challenges with time management.  If you’ve ever felt like you’re behind no matter how hard you work, or like everything on your list feels urgent, The Smarter Accountant’s Cheat Sheet for Better Time Management will help you finally understand what’s really going on.

Inside, I break down 7 common time drains accountants deal with, what your brain has to do with it, and what you can start thinking differently so you’re not ending the day feeling frustrated and unfinished.

If that sounds like something you need, you can grab your copy at thesmarteraccountant.com/cheat-sheet. It’s free, and it’s really helpful.

Alright—let’s talk about something I know so many accountants deal with: that weird feeling like you’re not in charge of your day.

You’ve got a plan. You’ve got a list. But then something small—an email, a craving, a client request—suddenly takes over. And before you know it, the day feels like it’s running you.

That’s what we’re getting into today: feeling more in control. Because when you don’t feel in control, everything feels harder.

For example, you want to stop working at a certain time… but keep going. You want to focus on one thing… but keep bouncing. You tell yourself “no more scrolling”… and then catch yourself doing it again.

It’s like your brain has its own plans, and you’re just along for the ride.

That used to be me. I’d finish a full day of work, check a bunch of things off my list, and still feel like I was behind. I couldn’t figure out why I felt so off when I was getting so much done.

Turns out, control isn’t about doing more—it’s about how you feel while you’re doing it. And whether you’re making decisions on purpose or reacting without thinking.

When your day feels like one long reaction, it’s draining. You lose focus. Everything starts to feel heavier than it should.

And let’s not forget the guilt. You say you’re not going to check your email every five minutes, or you promise you’ll stop working at six, and then you don’t. That voice in your head gets louder: “See? You can’t even stick to this.”

But what if none of that had to mean anything bad about you? What if you weren’t weak… and just needed a different way to think about what’s happening?

That’s what we’re talking about today. No tricks. No pressure. Just something simple that can honestly shift how your whole day feels—one urge at a time.

What Urges Are and Why They Matter

Let’s start by talking about urges—those little nudges your brain sends that can totally throw off your day.

They can show up fast and strong, like a tiny voice saying, “Check your email,” “Grab a snack,” or “Say yes, even though you’re already swamped.”

And even though they seem like they come out of nowhere, they don’t. They’re actually sentences in your brain that create emotions that show up in your body.

Maybe you feel your chest tighten. Maybe your leg starts bouncing. Maybe you get that restless feeling that makes it hard to sit still or focus.

That’s your brain doing what it’s been trained to do. Most urges are tied to something it has learned over time—like when you feel stressed and your brain says, “Let’s fix this fast.”

So you check your email. Or grab your phone. Or reach for something to eat. And your brain goes, “Whew, that’s better.”

That tiny moment of relief creates what’s called a habit loop. It tells your brain, “That worked, let’s do it again next time.”

And the more that loop gets repeated, the stronger it becomes—even if it’s not actually helping you.

This is something most accountants were never taught to notice. We were told to work harder. Push through. Be more disciplined.

And maybe that works for a while… until you hit a wall. Until you’re too tired, too busy, or just too frustrated—and your primitive brain takes the wheel.

The truth is, fighting urges all day is exhausting. And the more you try to ignore them or push them away, the louder they tend to get.

Even though you can’t outwork an urge, you can learn to let it show up without acting on it.

That’s the shift. And it’s one that makes a big difference.

It might sound a little strange at first, but learning how to allow an urge without doing anything is a real skill. One that can totally change how you move through your day.

Let’s talk about what’s going on in your brain when an urge shows up, so you can start to see it a little differently.

The Brain Science Behind Urges

Your brain is built to help you feel better fast. That’s its thing.

It doesn’t care about your calendar or long-term plans. It cares about comfort—and it wants it now.

That’s where dopamine comes in. It’s the feel-good chemical your brain releases when something seems rewarding.

So let’s say you’re feeling stressed and you check your email. Your brain goes, “Ahh, that worked,” and gives you a little dopamine boost.

It’s tiny, but it’s enough to make your brain say, “Let’s do that again next time.”

And that’s how a habit starts. Your brain remembers what gave it relief, and it wants to repeat it.

Each time you give in to an urge, you make that habit loop stronger. It’s like walking the same trail over and over—it gets clearer and easier to follow.

The tricky part is, your brain thinks it’s helping. Even if the habit isn’t helpful, it still feels good in the moment.

But here’s the good news: your brain can change. You’re not stuck with the old trail.

It doesn’t take willpower. It takes awareness.

When you feel an urge and don’t act on it, you interrupt the loop. You teach your brain, “We’re doing something new now.”

At first, it might not like that. The urge might feel stronger. That’s normal.

But if you keep allowing it without reacting, your brain starts to quiet down. It stops pushing so hard.

And the more you allow, the less urgent the urges feel. Your brain starts to learn that it doesn’t need the reward to be okay.

You start to feel more in charge. Not because the urges go away completely—but because they stop running the show.

Now that you know what’s going on in your brain, I want to explain how the 100 urges process works, and why it’s such a helpful way to build real control.

How the 100 Urge Process Works

Let’s talk about what it actually means to allow an urge—because it’s not about stopping it or pushing it away.

It’s about letting the feeling show up, noticing it in your body, and deciding not to react.

That might look like this: you feel the urge to check your email, grab your phone, or say yes to something you don’t want to do. You pause, take a breath, and tell yourself, “This is just a feeling. I don’t have to act on it.”

You might feel it in your chest. Or your arms. Or that strong pull to do something right away. That’s all normal.

You don’t need to fix it or make it go away. You just stay with it for a few seconds.

That’s what allowing looks like. No big drama. Just staying with the feeling and letting it pass on its own.

The 100 urges idea is about turning this into a small daily practice—one urge at a time. And if 100 feels like too much right now, start with 10. You can always build from there.

Here’s are some quick steps to start allowing urges:

1 – Notice the urge

Pause when you feel pulled to do something out of habit—like checking email, grabbing a snack, or reacting quickly.

2 – Name it

Say to yourself, “This is just an urge.” That simple sentence helps create space.

3 – Feel it in your body

Where is it showing up—tight chest, racing thoughts, fidgeting? No need to change it. Just notice.

4 – Take one slow breath

Remind yourself, “I don’t have to do anything right now.”

5 – Let it pass

Most urges fade in less than 90 seconds when you don’t react to them.

6 – Track it

If you allowed the urge without acting, give yourself credit. Check off a box or mark it somewhere. Tracking it will help you reach whatever goal you set and it will help you rewire your brain.

7 – Keep going

If you gave in, it’s okay. You don’t count that one. No guilt—just try again next time.

That’s all this is. One urge at a time. You don’t need to do anything perfectly—you just need to practice.

And once you’ve allowed even 10 urges, you’ll start to notice a shift. You’ll feel a little steadier. A little more in charge.

By the time you reach 100, your brain will be in a whole new place.

Now I want to show you what this looked like for a coaching client of mine. Her story might sound familiar.

Becoming a Smarter Accountant: Allowing 100 Urges

One of my coaching clients came to me feeling like her workdays were running her—not the other way around. She was smart, hardworking, great with clients… but she felt completely out of control.

She told me she was checking her email constantly. Not just a few times a day—every few minutes. Half the time, she didn’t even notice she was doing it.

She always felt behind, like something was slipping through the cracks. And even when she wasn’t behind, she still felt that pressure.

She blamed herself. She kept saying, “If I could just stop checking, I’d be fine.” She thought it was a discipline problem.

But when we started working together, it became clear it wasn’t really about the email.

It was the urge to check it whenever she felt anxious. Her brain had made that connection—stress pops up, email gives relief. That became her loop.

At first, she didn’t think allowing the urge without checking would make a difference. But she agreed to try it once a day. Just once.

She’d notice the urge, take a breath, and do nothing.

She started to see it for what it was—a little ripple in her body that passed quicker than she expected. It wasn’t a problem. It wasn’t an emergency.

Little by little, she stopped reacting. She trusted her planned email time was enough. Her calendar felt doable again.

She said to me, “I feel like I finally have my brain back.”

She didn’t turn into a robot. She still felt stress. She still had urges. But now she understood what was happening—and didn’t panic when they showed up.

She wasn’t stuck in the same loop anymore. She was aware of what was going on.

And that changed everything.

Key Takeaway and Action Item

The key takeaway from this episode is that you don’t have to fight urges. That’s not the answer.

You just need to understand what they are and what your brain is trying to do when they show up.

Once you start noticing them instead of reacting to them, everything starts to shift. Even allowing one or two can remind you that you’re not stuck.

You’re capable of showing up in a new way. And you don’t need to do it perfectly for it to make a difference.

If you want to try this today, here’s a question to ask yourself:

“What urge do I usually give in to that I’m willing to allow today instead?”

That one small moment of awareness might be all you need to take your day in a better direction.

So much of the pressure accountants feel doesn’t come from the work itself. It comes from feeling like we’re not in control of how we’re showing up to it.

When you learn to allow urges instead of reacting to them, you start to build something that no calendar or planner can give you—real self-trust.

You start to see that you don’t have to be pulled around by your day. You get to decide how you show up to it.

And the more you practice allowing urges, the easier it gets. It becomes less about willpower and more about awareness.

Pulling Back the Curtain

Pulling back the curtain for a moment…

There was a time in my life when I didn’t realize how often I was reacting to urges. Little things—like checking email when I felt anxious, grabbing a snack when I was overwhelmed, or staying up late working because I felt behind.

And what’s interesting is that I was still getting things done. I was still checking boxes, showing up, being productive. But inside I felt completely out of control.

It was like I was following this invisible script all day long—without even realizing I was doing it. And the part that hit me the hardest was when I realized how normal it had all started to feel.

I remember one afternoon—I had blocked time for something important, but I kept checking email. Every few minutes. I’d tell myself, “Just one quick look,” and then 30 minutes would go by. I wasn’t even aware of the urge anymore. I had become the urge.

That’s when I realized: productivity isn’t the same thing as control. I could be efficient and still feel totally hijacked by my brain.

Learning to allow urges—actually feel them without giving in—was uncomfortable at first. But once I got the hang of it, everything started to shift. I wasn’t constantly pulled in a hundred directions. I could feel an urge and just… breathe. Wait. Let it pass.

It felt like I was finally in the driver’s seat. Not fighting myself, not trying to be perfect—just noticing, choosing, and moving forward with more intention.

And that’s why I teach this to the accountants I coach. Because this one mental skill—allowing urges—has the power to make you feel calm, focused, and genuinely in control, even when the work is intense.

If this episode hit home and you’re ready to feel more in control of your time, your focus, or even just your brain during the day, I invite you to take The Smarter Accountant Quiz at www.thesmarteraccountant.com.

It’s a quick and insightful way to uncover the real reasons your day might feel harder than it needs to be.

And if you’re ready to take back control but aren’t sure where to start, book a free 30-minute call with me at www.thesmarteraccountant.com/calendar. We’ll talk through what’s happening, what your brain’s doing, and how to make things easier.

And if you’ve been enjoying this podcast, I’d be so grateful if you shared it with another accountant. Most of us were never taught this stuff—and the more we spread the word, the more we can change what it means to be successful in this profession.

The truth is that you’re already smart, but this podcast will show you how to be smarter.